I have, I don't, I will not, I feel, I wish, I know, I see, I am

I have:

1. Never: gotten the cool shoe shine

2. Always: sang along even when I don't know the words (which I mostly don't)

3. Frequently: been happy to misspell words

4. Often: found myself writing a book inside my head

5. Forever: hoped that people wouldn't see me for what I secretly am

I don't:

1. Want: to know what my future is until I live it

2. Need: everything I own

3. Mean: to be so cut off

4. Mean: what I just wrote

5. Always: love what I see

I will not:

1. Eat: green eggs and ham (I'm a vegetarian and I hate eggs. Green eggs, means that their worse for being moldy)

2. Miss: my eldest sister's wedding even if she marries that guy I hate (I hope she doesn't!!!)

3. Buy: any more books till I finish all the ones waiting for me here at home.

4. Do: what I just wrote

5. Enjoy: that feeling that I have right now that has been festering in the crook of my back for sixteen years.

I feel:

1. Pain: from the lies I tell

2. Shock: that people can be like this...

3. Guilt: for that thing I promised myself last night and have already not carried out.

4. Anger: at the things she says

5. Alone: too often

I wish:

1. Someone: understood

2. No one: saw underneath the surface

3. Life: could show history not repeating itself

4. People: would gain compassion from their wrongs

5. I: was the person I saw in the mirror last night

I know:

1. I: can do better than this

2. Myself: not at all, sometimes

3. Books: do not cure the pains of yesterday

4. Life: tends to get you lost

5. Time: runs the other way in my sleep

I see:

1. Myself: for what I know to be harsh

2. Life: as something temporary

3. Time: as an enemy

4. Age: when I look at my tree

5. Nothing: when I think of that day

I am:

1. Nothing: that you can change

2. Something: that can hurt you

3. Angry: by useless comments

4. Not: playing your game anymore

5. Lost: when I hear that voice

[coagulatedknees]

Need

I'm trying to leave that behind me.

I'm finding it closer

Than ever before

Because of what you have

Newly explained to me.

Does that make sense?

Do you know?

I found it lost and in the middle

Of wasting it's meaning

On those that would flaunt their feelings

And I couldn't leave it without showing you.

Do you recognize it?

It's too perfect to be shut away

And I needed to tell you.

And I needed to show you.

And I need you to need me.

Like our talk last night.

It made me feel wanted

And I can't thank you enough

I won't abuse

But I might use....

So be ready for it, because you handled it well

And I hope to see it again.

Just ask me and it changes!

So close to what I used to think

Yet different from what I've known

And know now.

It's new!

Did you know?

And I wanted to tell you.

And I wanted to show you.

And I need you too, did you know?

I only did so then because of before...

What you never meant to say, but did...

It's funny that it changes that way.

Switched that flip.

Pressed that button.

And it's you

Because of me

And not for lack of knowledge.

I know your past.

You know mine.

Let's just see.

Let's just see.

Let's just see...

And I wanted to tell you.

And I wanted to show you.

Because we need it.