Back at 'em.

Hey guys!!!! It's meeeeee! I'm back!!!!!!!!!!!

And I really want to give this a real shot again. It used to be so much fun and I miss is a lot.


So I can't wait for orchestra to start. It's next monday and I'm so excited! I know, I know, I'm an orch dorch...But hey!!! What's wrong with that??

Dood, school is going to be awesome this year. I like it already. Oh, and another thing, I'm not saying that I'm "homeschooled" anymore. I am "self-schooled."

When you say, "Oh, I'm homeschooled" people immidiately think that you're at home all the time. UNTRUE!! Though most of my mornings are at home (since most things don't start till evening due to the fact that everyone else is in school and also because I haven't yet ended my summer job and gone out for another one) I'm always out and about during the evenings!! Yay!!

Ok guys, I miss you all! Comment box is open and I'm off to go and leave some on your pages. I LOVE YOU!!!

happy birthday, girl!

I'M SEVENTEEN!!!!!!!!!!!!

I have resolutions.



THEY WILL BE CARRIED OUT!!!

friends

Hey look, people, look! I'm updating!!! DO THIS TOO! WE ARE KEEPING BLOGGER ALIVE!!!


So, I realized something about human behavior today.

Today, I got pretty pissed at some co-workers. Miscomunication happened and I got the fuzzy end of the lolipop, so to speak.
When someone gets annoyed or sad or angry or something like that, their usual response is not to try and hide the hurt/pain (etc.) but to flaunt it. I know that not everyone does this but I noticed that I did it myself, today. See, I believe that it's because we are worried that our friends, or those around us, won't care enough (or know us enough) to recognize that something is wrong if we would try to act like nothing was bothering us. I think that it's an insecurity that we feel. When people get upset, often they like to have other people comforting them or listening to them rant. Also, it's often that the person who is unhappy doesn't want to have to approach their friends and let them know their feelings. It's common that the upset people would rather their friends figure out that they are unhappy and then try to help them. But see, we don't all have friends who care this much. I know that if I was with you guys, I could have tried to act completely calm and one of you would have been like, "Grace, I can tell that something's up. What's wrong?"
Mia even did that to me today, further proving my point. However, with some people, I feel like I have to shout it to them before they catch on! And then when she did catch on, she made it all about herself...and I hate that. Sometimes, she's so stuck in her messed up world that she doesn't even think that mine might be less than perfect, which is completely. She's screwing up her life and loving it. I get to wait in the wings and be the friend that she needs when it crashes down around her.

Friends...a definition that bears repeating. You guys are my friends. I'm so glad I have you all.

stank, stink, stunk. shower?

Ah, the lovely smell of "after-work."

I really stink, guys. It's terrible. And I'm all sweaty and gross...Why am I updating instead of showering???


Oh well. Hey, the Children's Zoo opened yesterday! My job has been so hectic. I'm going crazy but it's a good kind of crazy. I was annoyed because we really ought to trim Circe's (the female potbellied pig) hooves but since we're not trained in that yet, we had to try and file them down today. We spent so long just filing away with this puny nail file that my mom had donated for the cause and we barely changed anything! Grrr, why can't we just clip them??

The goats are so cute!!! My favorite so far is the smallest of the group. Her name is Skittles and she's so tiny and cute!! The funny part about it is that all the bigger goats are afraid of a lot of humans but Skittles will walk right up to you!!! Smallest and boldest!!! It's awesome.

I love my job.

Well, I guess it'd be appropriate to go shower now...for the sake of the neighbors...haha!

j-o-b

Well, it's started! My job has finally begun! I didn't know it, but I was straining at the lead to get back to a full-time job. It has this affect on me. During the summer, all I have to worry about is stepping out of bed. Then everything flows from there. Somehow, I find myself at the end of a work day with splinters in my hands, cuts, scratches, and bruises everywhere, worn out, flaked with alfalfa and timothy hay as well as bedding straw, and you know what? I'm so entirely happy that I can't even begin to disinfect my bleeding arms. I just want to run around the zoo crying, "I WORK HERE! I AM A KEEPER AT THE ZOO!! I WORK AS A KEEPER HERE, AT THE ZOO!! I LOVE MY ZOO!! (hey, how bout you?-stupid logo)"

Oh, and I got sunburn today. SUNBURN!! I am so happy that the sun is back!

p.s. Rochwen, that stuff we talked about on the phone on tuesday night...that stuff about...amit and Z. It doesn't matter anymore. Because Obi is so sweet I can't look them in the eyes!

:-)

Wow. My boyfriend is so random and cute!


KMODODRAGON245: but when i am cold i like hoodies
daphroggie: yeah, hoodies are the best
KMODODRAGON245: i know
KMODODRAGON245: i got used to wearing them and then after it hit that time where it was too warm for them i was trying to find the pocket in the front
daphroggie: I ALWAYS do that withmy zooteen sweatshirt!!!
KMODODRAGON245: lol
KMODODRAGON245: its funny cause in one attempt i will try to find it like 2 or 3 times before i realize its not there
daphroggie: I know
daphroggie: you get all pissed cause you can't find it and you look down andyour like, "oh...well that wasstupid
KMODODRAGON245: yeah
KMODODRAGON245: i love you
daphroggie: HEY! I was about to say that!
KMODODRAGON245: lol
KMODODRAGON245: beat you to it

I'M GONNA FINISH SCHOOL THIS WEEK!!!!!!!!!!! Doesn't that rock? I think it basically rocks, people.

??

HEY!!! I'm updating again because, well, that's just fun.

The sleepover was awesome!! Tay, I missed you a lot and it was awesome seeing you again!!!


Oh, the family wants me downstairs...I better do what they say or they're likely to cut off my other ear. It's hard enough hearing out of one....


that was random and yes, I have both ears...

speechless!

@--,--'--,--'----

If you would actually cut me,
My blood would release me from this prison.

But you keep your horrible distance,
And I'm left behind your eyes, crushed at my stupid exhistance.

Because when I see your glances,
I just know that they can't hold the truth that I create in them.

So go on, abuse me again.
You achieve this so well without physical contact...

please...

All I do is listen to "Hey There Delilah" and think about you.






Forgive me...





Hey there Delilah
What's it like in new York city
I'm a thousand miles away
but girl tonight you look so pretty
Yes you do
Time square cant shine as bright as you
I swear its true

Hey there Delilah
Don't you worry about the distance
I'm right there if you get lonely
Give this song another listen
Close your eyes
Listen to my voice its my disguise
I'm by your side

Oh its what you do to me
Oh its what you do to me
Oh its what you do to me
Oh its what you do to me
What you do to me

Hey there Delilah
I know times are getting hard
But just believe me girl
Someday ill pay the bills with this guitar
We'll have it good
We'll have the life we knew we would
My word is good

Hey there Delilah
I've got so much left to say
If every simple song I wrote to you
Would take your breath away
I'd write it all
Even more in love with me you'd fall
We'd have it all

Oh its what you do to me
Oh its what you do to me
Oh its what you do to me
Oh its what you do to me

A thousand miles seems pretty far
But they've got planes and trains and cars
I'd walk to you if I had no other way
Our friends would all make fun of us
and we'll just laugh along because we know
That none of them have felt this way
Delilah I can promise you
That by the time that we get through
The world will never ever be the same
And you're to blame

Hey there Delilah
You be good and don't you miss me
Two more years and you'll be done with school
And ill be making history like I do
You know its all because of you
We can do whatever we want to
Hey there Delilah here's to you
This ones for you

Oh its what you do to me
Oh its what you do to me
Oh its what you do to me
Oh its what you do to me
What you do to me

random poetry

Gee, Sir, I didn't notice my heart was BLEEDING ALL OVER YOUR SHOES.

Try My Kite

Join me in my
Own reverie of
Everlasting pain.

Come and
Observe this
Rueful and sorrowful
Exageration of true
Yearning!

I

Look towards
Ominously full
Vases of true and
Emphatic

Tears that drop from
High, high above.
Explain, my dear one,
Explain all!

Is it not
Too much to
See your face?

No. I don't last
On my own without your
Towering looks,

Serene glances. Lighting
Everything up with
Radiant light,
Illuminating my
Outward stretching arms
Underneath their
Sagging weights of shame.

Wouldn't you stay
In my heart?
True, we are
Here only for
Our short,
Undetermined
Time.

Yet stay,
Oh stay,
Under my heart!


Hmm...that ones two dimensional.

Linger Longer, Jaim

I saw that glance
Return my own
Watched your dance,
Made my eyes roam.

But when my gaze
Has fixed on you,
My mind's a maze
With no way through.

Try as I might
It's always the same.
My chest gets tight
My legs feel lame.

So linger longer,
Stay, oh stay.
Linger longer,
Make my day.


Oh, I like that one. And what is up with my obsession with the word JAIM? I guess I'll find out today...

yes!

I'M A GREEN BELT!!!!!!!!!!

And wow, you make me love you more everytime I see you.

How charming can a guy get??

Pieces of my sleep

When I pull the brush through my hair
I see the pattern forming
And slices of my dreams haunt my mind.
Enough to remember how I felt
But not where I am...



Corey: You remain in my mind, as usual. I hope you feel at home...your there to stay for a while...


I just like you too much, sorry.

Braid Obsessed

I can't believe
How much I've waisted my time...
-Jem, 24.



I.LOVE.JEM.


It's simple.


Oh, and I love you too, Corey.

please say he didn't die...aw..

Aww....I never realized that it said, "Please say HE didn't die."
Oh, man, that's so sad!

Man, jem rules my life. Jem rules my life so much.


So that means that "Missing You" isn't about a break-up, like I thought. Its about a death...aw, I'm so sad! Okay, now you have to read the lyrics to join me in this sad reverie.

Here's "Missing You"-one of my favorites and now, even sadder than it was.


I wish this could be
A happy song
But my happiness disappeared
The moment you were gone

Don't think I ever believed that
This day would come
Now all I'm feeling
Is lost and numb

And ohhh I know I promised
Mmmm that I would try

But I, yes I, miss you
And it's killing inside

I'll always be thankful
For the time we had
We were blessedI should celebrate
But I feel too sad

All the wonderful memories
Just make me fall apart
And it feels like somebody's
Stabbed me in my heart

And ohhh I know I promised
Mmmm that I wouldn't cry

But I, yes I, miss you
And it's killing inside
Ooh well I, yes I, miss you
Want you by my side

Walking, holding hands
Talking, making plans
Touching my heart my soul

I wish this could be
A happy song
But my happiness disappeared
The moment you were gone

Tell me it's not happening
Say it's not as it seems
Tell me that I'm gonna wake up
It's just a bad dream

Please tell me that it's fiction
Tell me it's just a lie
Whatever you choose to tell me
Please say HE didn't die

And I, yes I, miss you
And it's killing inside
Ooh well I, yes I, miss you
Want you by my side
Ooh well I, miss you
Want you by my side
Back here by my side
Here by my side





Jem. Rules. My. Life.

I just want to tattoo the lyrics across my soul and play the music continually in my head. I can't stop this true love for their music! IT'S SO AMAZING!

???????

Jem rules my life.




Here's the vote, guys. Tell me what you think and if you have no idea what I'm talking about, just say something anyway, okay? It's not something I'm gonna explain on here so just put some random answer down for me, okay? Thanks!!


Should I drop Z? Just stop trying? Just stop hoping?

I'm at a loss and I need your vote!

thanks all!

soar gnomes

SOAR GNOMES

Just as it washes up on the shore
Leave her alone
Leave her alone

Let it lay there, feeling no more
Wishing for home
Wishing for home

She hides it all, keeps it in store
Breaks the phone
Breaks the phone

For herself, she cannot feel poor
Her heart roams
Dies in its tome


My essay rocks, amigos. But it's pretty long. Too bad! You'll all want more to read!!!! MWAHAHAH!!
Guys, what the heck is our economic homework??

@--,--'--,--'---
I'm so happy
@--,--'--,--'---

fix it

It helps to know what you're doing when they tell you, "Please fix this on pain of death."





yeah, that helps.

this is not a good thing...

Today is my deadline.

I DON'T HAVE MY PAPER READY YET!!!! GAH!!! WHAT AM I DOING HERE??? I GOTTA GET TO WORK!!

so anyway, what's up?

no, no!! NO!! DON'T GET SUCKED INTO BLOGGER!!! LEAVE NOW BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE!!!!





uh-oh

2+2=7

if 2+2=7
then 5x5=3
because i know 7+2=59
but i doubt 3x4=13



you get me?




if I fall, don't pick me up.









I'm hugging the earth:-)

to sin or love

she watched him turn
and turn he did
she saw him yourn
for things forbid

but did she stop him
from his dream?
did she try
to end his scheme?

no, she used endurence best
and showed him where his longing chest
could come, at end of day, to rest
beside her, both their souls undressed

"come try to be
controlled in love.
come right by me
and sin, my love"

could she have given
any less?
could he have lived in
saint's confess?

the answer, as I'm sure you know
can only be "resounding NO!"
for he could neither stay nor go
had he forsaken her virtue so!

"don't toy with our
transparent love.
come by the hour
and sin, my love"

no more could he
resist perfection
"I must own this key
to her affection"

he offered all
and gave her more
would this be her fall
or her chance to soar?

"we could drop
and lose our love.
but by me stop
and sin, my love"

Boq and Nessa make me happy!

Life is so amazing. I love how it tricks us, makes us fall and then helps us learn how to stand up.

Here is a few lyrics from the musical "Wicked" which I am currently obsessed with. The story here is that Boq really invited Nessarose (who is paralyzed and in a wheelchair) to make Galinda happy because he likes her but when he's with Nessarose, he falls for her. It's a really sweet song when you listen to it and it's very funny! But It's mostly just cute. Enjoy! oh, all caps means that they're singing those parts and the regular sized letters are spoken parts, just to let you know.


Boq: LISTEN-NESSA-

Nessarose: yes?

Boq: UH-NESSA
I'VE GOT SOMETHING TO CONFESS, A
REASON WHY, WELL-
WHY I ASKED YOU HERE TONIGHT
NOW I KNOW IT ISN'T FAIR...

Nessarose: Oh Boq, I know why.

Boq: You do?

Nessarose: IT'S BECAUSE I'M IN THIS CHAIR
AND YOU FELT SORRY FOR ME
WELL-ISN'T THAT RIGHT?

Boq: No! No! It's because....because....
BECAUSE YOU ARE SO BEAUTIFUL!

Nessarose: OH, BOQ, I THINK YOU'RE WONDERFUL!
AND WE DESERVE EACH OTHER
DON'T YOU SEE, THIS IS OUR CHANCE?
WE DESERVE EACH OTHER
DON'T WE, BOQ?

Boq: You know what? LET'S DANCE...

Nessarose: What??

Boq: LET'S DANCE!

GARRRR, i'm wild and UNTAMEABLE!!

woah. Possessiveness sucks.


I AM NOT AN ITEM!! NO MAN CAN OWN ME!! NO MAN CAN TAME ME!!


And if he thinks any differently (which he DOES) he's got another thing coming...



TODAY!!

doodley dooo

a discussion we will have

i hope it will go well

i'm bored

I FRICKEN HATE SIBBIE!!

cha...

D-D-Do I dare??




HELL FRICKEN YES!!!


oh! It must be because my hair is growing out...

polish this, Brubaker!! (wtf? who the crap is Brubaker??)

so:

Happy Christmas my dears!!!!



Life? life is pretty good.
Can't complain, can't complain....can't complain, can't complain....can't complain...specially tonight....

Carrits: I NEED TO TALK TO YOU! SORRY I DIDN'T RETURN YOUR CALL TODAY! I PROMISE TO TOMORROW, GIRL!


so, so late and i should so, so go.

hope you guys are having good lives. if not, tell me and we'll talk!

I miss you guys all terribly. It seriously hurts, doods. Life without friends is hardly life at all.

come look, come look!
there she lies
the invisible woman
who's made seen
by her mirrored affections
in the now visible standerby
he's joined her game,
she let's him win...




gosh, i'm such a nut

I can relate...

"...and thus, we fall from love so quickly, only to be picked up again by our beloved secrets and dark angels..."
-Agramedia on her affair with Cetherial

look at this cute shrew!!! I cannot resist this as a profile pic, if I can get it to work!!

...or not

*

*sometimes, it doesn't matter how bad of a day I've had if he just holds me tight*

:-)


Expectations. Eat lead.

such is life

c'est la vie

M

It's painful, but it's life.
I couldn't do any of this if MURPHY weren't back.

how does this work?

Changes

If any of you were wondering...

Cesario/Viola: A shipwrecked lass from "Twelve Night or As You Like it". She loses her twin brother in the waters and believes him to be dead. She goes into town dressed as a man (her name then is Cesario) to look for a job so that she doesn't starve. She comes to the house of Duke Orsino. The Duke is in love with a nearby lovely maiden named Olivia. But Olivia is vain and refuses the Duke's love. Orsino hires Viola/Vesario to go and woo Olivia for him. But in the course of this, Olivia falls in love with Viola/Cesario!!! It is a comedy that tangles up love and then twists it out beautifully. I see many similarities between the well-written character of Viola/Cesario and you, Rochwen.
Jessica: Jessica is a rebel from "The Merchant of Venice". She is the daughter of a wealthy jew but is in love with the Christian Lorenzo and he with her. They know her father would never approve of their love so she runs off with Lorenzo!! Tators, I thought of you just because she does this running off at like, 5:30 in the morning and that's when you get up...lol!
Anne Page: The daughter of Mistress Margaret Page and Master George Page from "The Merry Wives of Windsor". Don't know too much about the play but it's a comedy and for some reason, I picked it for you, Kam! Don't know why, lol!
Caliban: a deformed monster from "The Tempest". He is a slave to Prospero and does his deeds for him. He causes lots of trouble so I kinda thought of you, Sauron's Kid....
Isabella: A tormented nun from "Measure for Measure". I guess I was a little out of ideas for you, kiki. Isabella has to decide whether to give up her virginity to the stand-in Duke, Angelo or let her brother, Claudio, die! It's just a big mix-up so I probably thought about you because things seem to be rather hectic and mixed up for you right now...lol.
Beatrice: An orphan from "Much Ado About Nothing". She is witty and very comical but she has trials in her life. I thought of you for this one, Beinohtar.
The Trojans: Just a group of people fighting in a daunting battle from "Troilus and Cresida". Obviously, we as a group are fighting issues (if we're still gonna try to do this thing...) and so I thought of these guys.
Ariel: A spirit from "The Tempest". He is also a servant to Prospero but is a beautiful being who uses his abilities for the good that Prospero desires. You guys definitely fit this.
Hermia: She's not on my list because I can't link up to you but this is so you, carrits. Hermia is a besought lover from "A Mid-Summer Night's Dream". She goes into the enchanted forest with her lover Lysander to escape the man her father wished her to marry, Demitrius. But Helena, Hermia's friend who loves Demitrius, tells him that the two are escaping. So they all end up going in and mischievous things explode throught he forest. It's an awesome play.
Rosalind: K, she's not on there either but it's gray bean, yo. Rosalind is a cross-dresser from "As You Like It". Obviously for you, gray bean. Do I need to say more??? lol.

So, I hope you all like the new stuff and tell me if you want your links changed, or something.

I am losing a winning battle...

ahem...ahem hem....blah...ahem...brargitoomie...ahem (what is this?)

So, excited about tomorrow...which is actually today...because it's almost one in the morning...
Turkey day was interesting and thankfully turkey-less (for my part. I mean...there was turkey and my relatives were eating it but I certaintly wasn't). Did a lot of fighting with my older male cousin and my sister. We were using wooden sticks from my garage and we were fighting dagir style. Man it rocked. I only lost on round and all the rest were mine for the taking!! Ha!! Shove that in your face, cocky older male cousin and confident older sister!! Need to talk to you, Rochwen.
I keep singing that song to myself but it's so incorrect...
Okay, I gotta go. Bed...calling my name...must...sleep...
[coagulatedknees]
p.s. I really really really like snogging.

less sleep, more talk

Well, that was awesome!!!

It was so much fun having you guys come over and I'm so glad that I got to see you all!!! (again, missed tay...)!!
But yeah, I was so sleepy the next day!!! I went to go see Harry Potter 4 (OMG, I'M OBSESSED WITH DANIEL RADCLIFFE!!! EVEN MORE THAN BEFORE THIS!!!! LOL). It was good, as you can probably tell, lol!! But then I had to go early to my practice. I got there at six thrity and was there till ten. It wasn't so good for the obsessive sleeper in me!!! But we still had some fun. Shawn and I were completely sight-reading this peice that we'd told Maya that we'd practice so we were trying to look like we knew what we were doing!! Maya would stop us all and be like, "I think that you guys are getting the rythym wrong here," I'd be like, "Good job, Shawn!!! Gosh!! Kids these days!!" so I was trying to lighten my mood and keep myself awake (of course I wasn't being serious about blaming Shawn. We were all laughing and joking around. Actually, John did this really funny impression of Anna running home from college to play cello with us that made Shawn and me laugh REALLY hard!!).

But then I got home and, well, that's a whole other discussion that is NOT going to be posted on the internet.

[coagulatedknees]

p.s. (I like snogging)

times are hard. I'm burning these books...

Since screaming it would be rude and offending to people in this house, I'll just have to write here:

SHIT! FUCK, FUCK, FUCK!!! DAMN!!! BITCHES!!! SHIT, SHIT!!! FUCKING SHIT!!

I give up on math and chemistry.

[coagulatedknees]

Somethrong!! (I couldn't think of a better title...)

Ohhh, it's cold!!!

Hey, guess what? I passed my test!! I'm a green striped yellow belt now!!(observe the change of name in profile)!!! woo-hoo!

So, I'm looking forward to seeing y'all this Friday! I miss our group hanging out. We used to have so much fun!! So, I'm thinking it's time for another movie marathon!!! We haven't done Romance yet!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay, leave me some of your favorite romance movies and possible dates (not just days but for real dates) that you might be able to come. If this time of year is not good for you guys, lemme know and we'll postpone!!

missin you all

[coagulatedknees]

Toe rings and an update

Toe Rings
By ME!

Days change
The sons of our thoughts
Maiden change
For which we have fought

It's not easy to see
We need to stay near
For when we cease to be
Our life will be sheared

So walk with me
Walk in silence
It's not what you say
But what you have meant
So talk with me
Tell me your tale since
We've been so far away
And our live's been spent

Can you remember why
Do you remember when
My wasted sighs
And you would pretend

Would we have seen it
When did we know
Had you not have meant it
Had I not let it show

So Walk with me
Walk in silence
It's not what you say
But what you have meant
So talk with me
Tell me your tale since
We've been so far away
And our life's been spent

--------------------------------
So, life's been pretty good to me lately. Can't complain, can't complain. Saw Carrits in her highschool's production of "The Man Who Came to Dinner" and I of course couldn't scream loud enough for her and her amazing skills on the stage!!! GREAT JOB DARLING!!! So, had a pretty busy weekend. Rochwen, you would love Dagor!! I actually managed to kill some people even though it was my first day there!! I'll give you the details on Wednsday but I think that your gonn like it!

So, there's not much more to say other than Ayla rocks because she is re-doing my xanga and I'm sure it will kick butt!!! Thanks, girl!! OH, and Rochwen, you site is fricken awesome!!! How did you do that?????

[coagulatedknees]

I have, I don't, I will not, I feel, I wish, I know, I see, I am

I have:

1. Never: gotten the cool shoe shine

2. Always: sang along even when I don't know the words (which I mostly don't)

3. Frequently: been happy to misspell words

4. Often: found myself writing a book inside my head

5. Forever: hoped that people wouldn't see me for what I secretly am

I don't:

1. Want: to know what my future is until I live it

2. Need: everything I own

3. Mean: to be so cut off

4. Mean: what I just wrote

5. Always: love what I see

I will not:

1. Eat: green eggs and ham (I'm a vegetarian and I hate eggs. Green eggs, means that their worse for being moldy)

2. Miss: my eldest sister's wedding even if she marries that guy I hate (I hope she doesn't!!!)

3. Buy: any more books till I finish all the ones waiting for me here at home.

4. Do: what I just wrote

5. Enjoy: that feeling that I have right now that has been festering in the crook of my back for sixteen years.

I feel:

1. Pain: from the lies I tell

2. Shock: that people can be like this...

3. Guilt: for that thing I promised myself last night and have already not carried out.

4. Anger: at the things she says

5. Alone: too often

I wish:

1. Someone: understood

2. No one: saw underneath the surface

3. Life: could show history not repeating itself

4. People: would gain compassion from their wrongs

5. I: was the person I saw in the mirror last night

I know:

1. I: can do better than this

2. Myself: not at all, sometimes

3. Books: do not cure the pains of yesterday

4. Life: tends to get you lost

5. Time: runs the other way in my sleep

I see:

1. Myself: for what I know to be harsh

2. Life: as something temporary

3. Time: as an enemy

4. Age: when I look at my tree

5. Nothing: when I think of that day

I am:

1. Nothing: that you can change

2. Something: that can hurt you

3. Angry: by useless comments

4. Not: playing your game anymore

5. Lost: when I hear that voice

[coagulatedknees]

Need

I'm trying to leave that behind me.

I'm finding it closer

Than ever before

Because of what you have

Newly explained to me.

Does that make sense?

Do you know?

I found it lost and in the middle

Of wasting it's meaning

On those that would flaunt their feelings

And I couldn't leave it without showing you.

Do you recognize it?

It's too perfect to be shut away

And I needed to tell you.

And I needed to show you.

And I need you to need me.

Like our talk last night.

It made me feel wanted

And I can't thank you enough

I won't abuse

But I might use....

So be ready for it, because you handled it well

And I hope to see it again.

Just ask me and it changes!

So close to what I used to think

Yet different from what I've known

And know now.

It's new!

Did you know?

And I wanted to tell you.

And I wanted to show you.

And I need you too, did you know?

I only did so then because of before...

What you never meant to say, but did...

It's funny that it changes that way.

Switched that flip.

Pressed that button.

And it's you

Because of me

And not for lack of knowledge.

I know your past.

You know mine.

Let's just see.

Let's just see.

Let's just see...

And I wanted to tell you.

And I wanted to show you.

Because we need it.

Found

Today's troubles
You recognize
You listen
You calm

Tomorrows hopes
You see
You encourage
You inspire

Yesterday's regrets
You ease
You help
You relate

Divine
Amone
Need

She:
Angers me
She:
Hurts me
She:
Annoys me
You:
See me
She:
Pressures me
She:
Tries me
She:
Blames me
You:
Surprise me

Divine
Among
Need

Dreams describe
Our underlying
Us.
Rushed, they cannot
Create what we have
And only pain
Will bring about their end.
With such a physical
Between how can they know
What we have found?

Be careful, my dear friend
Find what we have found
Before you are hurt...

Divine
Among
Need

yay

What
Hell
On?
/
If
Someone...
/
Treated
Hell
In
Selfish
/
Guise
Under
Yours
?
If
/
They
Have
In
Near
Killings
/
It
/
Looks
In
Knife
Effogies
/
Humbly
If
Murder
/
Anounces
/
Lottery
Officials
Time
!
Then
Hell
Ends
/
Calm
Orderly
Order
Like
/
Things
Hindering
Imunity
Near
God
/
If
Songs
/
Take
Half
Among
Tears
/
Hate
Exhists
/
Like
Irreverent
Knives
Extinguishing
Souls
/
Murder
Enthralls
/
Torn
Orange!
On guard!!!!!!
!
!
!
(Can you find the hidden message?? haha)

New Feelings, Mixed Emotions

I am unpatient.
See me how I am.
What would you think
Were I to leap?
Or are my thoughts echoing your own
Like the first cry of a bird,
Bourn from it's travailing egg,
Across a lonely canyon
Where rock faces become yours.

Divine
Among
Nobody?

yeah, that just happened to me, yeah, yeah, it did...FINALLY

I cannot believe that just happened.

What the hell just happened?

YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[coagulatedknees]

Mellow freakin Yellow!!!

Okay, where have I been? Well, I just haven't had the internet for the last two weeks!!! A stupid virus denied me access!!! But now it's all fixed and everything is fine!

So, guess what???????????? I passed the test!!! I'm a yellow belt now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm just so extatic!!!!

Here's the rest of my update:

taken: the psat

finished: in-car driving lessons with instructors

getting ready for: a wedding performance and a halloween dance!

Problem: What the heck am I going to go as??? I only have till saturday and I have to come up with a wicked awesome costume that I can change into in the car in a hurry. Also, I have to be able to dance the night away in it so it HAS to be comfortable. I am at a lack for ideas. Does anyone have any suggestions? And please don't kid around with me and say something stupid because I'm really not in the mood, people!

*Kumsumnida

A little intro on the changes with a touch of my obssesion...

Sorry if I seem a little obsessed with my martial art, mates. It's just that I love it so much. The classes work you hard at things that are fun and challenging and they are the highlights of my week. I also want to try a lot of different types like Kung Fu and Ninjitsu and such. There's just too much to learn for me NOT to be obbsessed, eh?

Saw "The Corpse Bride" tonight with my sisters. It was really wicked-awesome! I need to go buy the cd.
Well, I guess I'll see most of you all tomorrow at Eco. and His. Farewell, then.

*Kumsumnida

Simple Ties of the Playful but Sorrowful Vee-Shwang Unity Progressives (Lyrics only, full song in production)

Just breath

In

and out

Things will come and go

There's nothing you can

Do about

the

change

Just smile

face

lifted up?

cease your denial

You can't be

gone

for OHHHHH too long

So breath

breath

breath

The face

From ours

It has come to be

And forever

Scars

It's not

The road we chose

But we can learn

From those

who know

So keep your calm

It's our only way

to find the friendly

Smiles of those

We love

At Death's own day

Come don, come don

These clothes we made

From years of tears

And all our mistakes

We shut them out

They've gone to far

Today we find

The simple life

And tight locked door

It's not my way

If it's come this far

To remain lovers

With heart's unscarred

I've WAITED for YOU

Since I was too young

my ignorance vain

My sad song was sung

If you can't belive

I wasted my sighs

It's not in my plaaa-aaa-aaaaace

To pull me

From your eyes

So Just Breath

Breeeeaaaath

Breath

Breath

Breath...

Stupid Tony! Stop Saying Her Name and Marry Her, Dood!!!

"Say it once, and there's music playing
Say it twice, and it's almost like praying
Maria
I'll never stop saying Mariaaaaaaaaaaaaaa"

I can't get this stupid song out of my mind since we played it in orchestra.
I mean, playing "West Side Story" is fun and all because it's pretty easy since
I've heard it about a million times before but still, it's going through my
freaking head!

I can't wait till my taekwon-do class tomorrow!!! It seems like it's been forever since my last class on Thursday evening! This weekend has sucked so bad (Except for my freakin awesome overnight and zoo EDventure with Mia!!!). Friday before the game=terrible. After Mia was gone on Saturday=terrible!!!!!!! Sunday=close to hell!!!! Finally, Monday rolls in and I have to do this driving lesson with this instructor. It was my first time EVER driving an automatic and it wasn't as much fun as driving manual. SERIOUSLY! My left foot was so bored! It kept looking up at me in this dejected sort of way and saying, "Isn't there anything I can do other than just sit here?" and I had to tell the poor thing, "No, I'm sorry, that's just the way it goes in an automatic."

But I think I did really well and I picked up the transmition pretty quickly. The instructor wasn't too bad either. I swear, though, he was Jean Hackman's twin brother!! He sounded like him too! It was freaky!!!! I have another lesson on friday. Wish me luck! Now, I have to go count down the minutes until I can go to my beloved class!! See ya!

[coagulatedknees]

It's so annoyingly sudden, eh?

Wow
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
Life rocks so much
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
And my taekwon-do rocks even more
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
And self-defenses now are the coolest ever....when you're doing them with the (ahem) right people
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
Well knock me silly, I don't think there's much that I can do about this....

reckless little me...whose he?

reckless little me.

turn my glasses into my needle.

send me where I want to go.

can't you know?

where I want to go?

reckless little me?

some words,

all the same.

others

spell my name.

picture it.

one

two

three

say cheese

it's the end

of someone

else's hard-earned

pay

but only the beggining

of our wasted day.

so fly

it's there to see

and when the reckless try

to be me?

well,

reckless little me

don't sink

your teeth aren't

strong for your height

it's not something

iInherited.

style lives on

but fasion dies at the front door.

try repeating this phrase.

"don't push me around"

but say it faster than

your normal snail

and don't emphasize

your life on the

'don't'

or even the

'push'

it's 'around'

that so many people

get caught up in

and if you say

'me'

one more time,

you'll find your hymm

now sings in a different key.

how can it be sattisfyed

when praise is turned to

self-endorced regurgitation.

Actions are

Speaking

So don't

Ever leave for a

Smoke

,

You can't

Over-react

Unless you

-

Drive in front

Of a semi-annual

Nusance and if

'

This indeed is goal, don't

-

Ever under-estimate a true

Vixen's powers for

Everyone hides in their

New shames!

-

Knifes are smarter than the

Next ruler

Or perhaps

Whatever you choose to the world in it's

-

Hell on the

Impudent earth.

Mindless dummies could not

-

Overpower him so

Read up on your stupid

-

History because

It's your neck on the

Slippery line, my friend.

-

But beware

Even supporters

Love a bad ending and

If there has

Ever been one, it's now

For pete's

Sake!